R.I.P. messages painted on cars-what do you think?

[NIGHTB1022]

If they had them for Mandy & her kids I would proudly display them on the back of my truck. She was a very close friend of my daughters. This was a horrible tragedy caused by drunk driving and sometimes people need to be reminded:

Community grieves a 'terrible tragedy' :: Herald News :: Local News

[~~Who,Me?~~]

I see those around here all the time and I don't get it. I'm weird and am always trying to do the math to figure out how old the person was when I should be paying more attention to the road. I don't want to tell anyone how to grieve, but this does seem like an odd way to do it, imo. I mean, if I did that, then I think I'd feel bad when we finally had to get rid of the car. I think I'd feel obligated to keep the back window or something.

I'm also a pretty private person and do not wish to wear my pain/loss/sorrow out there for everyone to see. How do you start to heal if you have that on your car and people ask you about it frequently?

[biscottilover]

I started seeing them a couple years ago, and I thought it was a local thing, but evidently it's all over the place.

I think that some of those individuals who have the decals have just found a way of compartimentalizing the pain of their loss in a way that works for them.

I agree. Also, I agree with the other posts that said that it's usually a tragic death, whether it be a fatal accident, a young baby/child, or a drunk driving victim. I haven't really seen any Grandma RIP messages on the back of cars, only untimely death RIP/memorials. I think it's a way of dealing with loss that was unexpected, esp regarding the public aspect of it.


Also, car nutz? I must be living under a rock because I've never seen those before. Where the heck do they put them? On the hitch?

[Simply_Me]

I have no problems with the decals,stickers,memorials,or etching into the windows of peoples cars. I think it is their way of easing the pain of their loss. I do have to wonder what some people would think if they saw the tatto on me that is a memorial for my dead brother.

(The background story for my tattoo is my brother honestly drew it,and used the saying in my tatoo)

[shelleyf]

My husband's brother was killed by his wife 5 years ago. My husband's younger brother got a tattoo with a cross and RIP with his brother's name on his arm. It makes him feel better somehow. His brother loved tattoo's and crosses so he did it for him. (not that he would know, but you know what I mean) I don't see anything wrong with it. His brother belonged to a wrestling group and was very loved by everyone. They made T-shirts of him and gave it to all the family members. We thought it was very thoughtful of them. I know it sounds weird but it made my husband and the rest of the family feel better for awhile like he was close to their heart. Now we keep the shirts in our dresser and take it out every once in awhile. We also have sketches made by an artist that hang in our house of him. He was a very great guy and is still missed terribly. His wife didn't even get in trouble for doing this and that is the hardest to take. We also don't get to see his children anymore and that hurts too. She keeps moving and will not let us see the kids.
One thing I do think is creepy is that my Dad's side of the family takes pictures of their loved ones in their casket and the casket being taken in and out of the hearse! I don't agree with that, I don't know why they would want that. But it makes sense in one way....My Mom told me years ago she was talking to this little boy and he told asked her if she wanted to see a picture of his Mother. My Mom said yes that would be nice. She was horrified when he showed her a picture of his Mother in a casket! He said that is the only picture he has of his Mother and he treasures it. My Mom almost cried and was sad after getting over the shock of seeing the woman in the casket. So some people do things for different reasons, and in the little boy's case I would have done the same thing.

[shelleyf]

[cbs123]

My best friend died in high school. Her mother told me once when I visited years later and talked about her daughter, that I was the only one who regularly said her daughter's name after she died. I think people need others to know that they have not forgotten - and in some way to make sure the world does not forget their loved one. The decal may serve that purpose.
quote]

I know a family that lost a young son. The son's birthday was coming up and I sent the mom a card telling her I was thinking of her and her family. She never spoke to me again. I honestly thought it was the right thing to do. I wouldn't want people to forget about my child if something happened to him.
I don't really mind the decals. It does make me sad to see them though. But maybe helps the family know people will remember.

[couponfanatic]

Never seen aything like that on a car, but what does weird me out is the people with many many tattoos, who tell anoyone who'll listen the story of their tattoos.
This one's for my buddy jim, 'cause he's great
This one lists the names of all my nieces and nephews
This one over here's all my cousins
These 4 are for my college buddies
This one's for that big car crash on I-95. What, no I didnt know anyone who died but I wanted to show my support.

You know who they are. You've probably met one or seen one on TV.

I can get the proverial "mom" , or Wife or kid(s) names, but to cover yourself in permanent tributes? Always struck me as odd.
Am I supposed to be impressed instead of repulsed?

Edit: Addition- before I offend anyone, I don't mean one "tribute" tattoo I mean when one person has like 20 of them.

[#1RobThomasfan]

I think however you want to memorialize a person should be up to you. I do not agree with tattoos, I would never get one. But who am I to tell someone thats tacky? If it makes them happy than so be it. I am one of those people who do have the lettering on my car window in tribute to my beloved grandmother and aunt who passed away. WHY? Because it comforts me to look in my rearview mirror and see their names there. It brings them to mind constantly. I also submit poems on their birthdays and the date they passed to our local hometown newspaper.WHY? Because they had lots of friends and I want everyone to know that someone still thinks of them daily and thinks about the impact their lives had on me and others. Bottom line for me is THEY were BOTH wonderful people and I feel that what I've done and will continue to do says to the world HEY THEY MAY BE GONE BUT THEY MEANT SOMETHING. I am sure some can't understand it but there are vast numbers out there who do. Like a mother here locally who lost her son in Iraq, I see her driving around town and say to myself wow I'm sorry you lost your son and thanks to him for serving his country. Or a lady here who lost her beloved granddaughter in a drunk driving incident. She uses her lettering in memory of her granddaughter to remind people that their actions can cost a beautiful life. People do need to know that others have not forgotten. I think its a wonderful tribute to someones life but then again thats my opinion.