The official Duggar family discussion thread!

[JulieDB]

OT: What's with the weird quoting?

Dunno. I am just pushing "Quote" and posting after.

[JulieDB]

I think the questions asked for tips on how you (general you, not specifically the Duggars) can support a large family. JB answered the question by listing things they to be frugal...like buying used and then he goes on to link the program he used to get debt free. It is a FAQ question on his website, he has no obligation to list every single method ever used or to disclose information about his wealth or income. He is free to answer as in depth as he likes or not at all. There is no lie by omission. He is not on trial or under oath. Now, he says he doesn't earn anything if you purchase the debt free program. That surprises me and i might be tempted to wonder if that is actually the truth. He is a Christian man, so guess I'm gonna give him the benefit of the doubt. I think JB interpreted the question the same way LL and I did and he has every right to answer in a general manner in his own websites FAQs.

I don't know about the others but my complaint goes beyond just the finances.

[JulieDB]

Oh, alright, I lied...how the heck is taking all those fantastic trips and eating in restaurants and traveling in a big, bad gas guzzling motor home living frugally??? Please tell me I am not the only one who sees the irony of all of this? For Pete's sake, I just took my boys to radio city music hall. We had cheap seats at a discount. We drove. We parked in a cheap parking garage and hoofed many blocks to get there. We ate a bagged lunch. It still cost me $300 (not counting the time off from my job, not that THEY work). Any idea how much that would have cost if I brought 20 children? They are absolutely NOT living frugally in my very humble opinion. And if that ain't misleading to say they are...

It's not living frugally. We don't buy too much used although daughter has use shirts. Her choice. I buy clearance, mostly online. We don't spend a lot on clothes. We have worn out furniture. We don't take vacations unless you count the cross country moves. Husband is in the military. We don't own a motor home or even violins. Altough I used to play. They are expensive.

[JulieDB]

OK so do you guys think this is the last pregnancy we will see from the Duggars?

It seems to me that her body is done. Do you think she will get pregnant again?

ETA: I am NOT asking for your opinion on whether or not she SHOULD get pregnant again, I am asking if you think she WILL get pregnant again.

Not only do I think she will but right away too!

[IntoTheMystic]

I don't know about the others but my complaint goes beyond just the finances.

My observations/concerns go beyond the finances, too.

I'm in the "live and let live" school, but that doesn't mean that we should stop thinking about what things mean. What does it mean that the gender roles are so rigid? What does it mean that a woman has no control over her reproductive rights? What does it mean that the father is the "leader" of the household? What does it mean that they espouse frugality but go on lavish trips? (at whose expense is not important to me) What does it mean that they have tried to distance themselves from a man who shall remain nameless, but they appear linked nonetheless? What does it mean that they are unaccepting of others differing beliefs- whether that be sexual orientation, religion or otherwise?

Yes, the Duggars are free to do as they please. But I am also free to comment on it. They are vocal in their beliefs; I have the right to be vocal in mine, and to not buy everything they are selling.

[clippyclippy]

Not that there needs to be any more opinionating here, but just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents...

The Duggars are no dummies. They know that if they shared all the details of their finances, they'd lose an audience. It would no longer be appealing to the people who feel they can identify with them as everyday people. The money made from their fame becomes kind of like the proverbial elephant in the room.

But the viewers allow it to be that way, because although they most likely know the Duggars bring in quite a bit of money from all those different sources, they can still learn from them and take what they want from the show.


An example in my life - I am a very frugal person. I grew up that way, and it's just in my blood I guess (you should meet my dad!)
My dh has a comfortable income and we don't have to be frugal, but we still live that way.

I'm kind of known for my frugal ways, and admired for it I guess. People around me always ask me how to save in this way or that and I try to help. Often it's someone who has run into tight times, or in a crisis of some sort. People will tell them to talk to me to learn how manage on less.

But what I never do is share the fact that I don't have to live this way. If I were to do that, I just think they would be less likely to feel comfortable talking about frugal living around me. They'd feel like I just wouldn't understand.

Besides, it's none of their business how much my dh makes, or how he makes the money. That isn't helpful info to anyone anyway. I'd rather keep that private and share the things that we can all identify with.

So that's sort of the way I see the Duggars - they want to meet people where they are, and not give anyone reason to think they are out of touch with the real world.

[IntoTheMystic]

Not that there needs to be any more opinionating here, but just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents...

Of course we need more opinionating in here. But Smee is remarkably silent tonight...and Scrappy...and Meggers...and CWM...

[shelleyf]

Omission to conceal wrongdoing or to deceive is wrong. It is not the same as lying, but goes along with lying. When one takes a vow of commitment, then when one cheats, they are breaking that vow, therefore "lying". The omission isn't lying, but the actions of breaking a vow you swore to keep is lying. Therefore, it isn't the failure to tell (the omission) that is THE LIE, but omission conceals the lie of not keeping a vow. Is someone single who "hooks up" with someone else at a bar who's single lying by not telling them that they are currently sleeping with other people? No, because there is no commitment.

Just because I say omission isn't always a lie doesn't mean that I support cheating by not telling, or committing wrongdoing and not telling. If someone asks someone else how many children they have and they reply 3, but they really had 4 children and one died, does that mean they are lying every time they say 3 instead of 4? Maybe they don't want to explain the other child's death every time they tell someone. You can argue the use of have vs had, but some people considering even the children that have passed away as living and they will see them again one day. Anyway, I wouldn't say there's any ill-intent no matter how they choose to answer, and I don't see any ill-intent in the way Michelle Duggar answered the question on how they support their children either.



Again, you keep talking about RICH. It wasn't a "how to get rich" question. I don't know how to explain it any better than I already have. I don't think anyone has said the Duggars are struggling or complaining about struggling. They seem to get by pretty good before and after the show. No doubt the extra income helps, but it still doesn't disqualify them from giving spending advice. They supported over 10 kids way before the show. They were debt-free way before the show. If the show didn't exist, they would still be supporting a large family and still doing the same things such as shopping secondhand.



If Dave Ramsey or Suze Orman was asked this question, they would offer suggestions of cutting down on debt, paying off credit cards, shopping used, using coupons, and other such advice. They would not go into how THEY PERSONALLY MAKE MONEY. They would probably start by saying they are debt-free, and they save their money by doing X. That's exactly what Michelle did, she started off by describing how they shop and you didn't post the rest of the answer where they went into how they attended a debt-free seminar and the start of their spending habits.

Heck, someone could reply with they support their family during this economy by collecting unemployment, receiving food stamps, and recycling cans. That answers the question and still has nothing to do with being RICH. It's about supporting the family, not about getting rich. Sometimes supporting the family could mean relying on others, and not just doing it all yourself. Combining households by children moving back home or parents moving in with their children could be another way to support so many people. The Duggars are known for not having to rely on gov't assistance though, and they have been doing that for a long time, so I think they are qualified to give SENSIBLE, and PRACTICAL advice such as what was given. Perhaps if everyone had been frugal BEFORE the economy went bad, they wouldn't find themselves needing financial advice NOW.

We will never agree on this so I am going to just not worry about it. I know what is going on and when I get rich I will make sure to let everyone know exactly how I did it. lol but it won't be by buying used I don't think.

[Macaela25]

I don't know how my potato cooking question got here.
Sorry guys.

With the places this thread has been...it would have been relevant somehow.

[aimeebee]

You know, I'm beginning to wonder if this whole show is going to go down in a blaze of glory...suffering a fate similar to J/K+8. They do have the same Figure 8 production company and network, after all. I don't care too much for the way this miscarriage has become a media event. I just don't think I've ever even heard of someone who lost their baby at 19 weeks having a "memorial" service with 200 of their closest friends and family members in attendance. What are all those people remembering, the Today show pregnancy announcement? An ultrasound picture? Some morbid fetus pictures and a recording of a letter Michelle read to Jubilee? (Which was posted on the Duggar's site today, BTW.)

In the beginning, I think people were drawn in to both shows by the big family, the cute kids and even the frugality that was required to make it work. It made them real and even if we couldn't identify with all their quirks and beliefs we watched and some of us wanted to learn more about them. But, the fame, the camera, the media, the perks and just the ongoing show changes things...and not for the better.

Now, it is starting to get to the point where we don't even recognize the family we started out watching....that frugal, larger Christian family has mainstreamed their hair, their clothes, upgraded their home with a little help from the network to get it done, upgraded their vehicles, their laptops and fancy cameras, and now all the trips and perks...it's just too much.

Does anybody remember that special before the series started? What was it called 15 Kids and on the road? The old RV that broke down before they could even get out of town, the stacks of Aldi's canned food, the cheesy roadside stops at the Worlds Biggest Ball of String type places? Let's compare that to this latest trip to Europe, with their iPhones and staying at the luxurious London hotel originallly made for guests of the Queen. Quite a world of difference there. It becomes harder and harder to identify with them. It was even a stretch in the beginning considering their size, faith, unusual hair and dress. The sad thing is what will become of the littlest kids if the camera crew leaves, the sister mommies get lives and families of their own and the media attention and money dry up?