OMG - I am so PI$$ED OFF at my DAD!

[disabledvetswife]

First of all, I am trying really hard not to have a profanity laced response and/or post. I don't usually say bad words, but I am just fit to be tied right now and those are the only words popping into my brain.

So, last week, my DAD says to me: "would you be mad at me if I asked ____ (my bff) out on a date". First let me say, it has NOTHING to do with age (she's 39; he's 59). I laid into him and told him exactly what I thought - it's perverted, disgusting and gross. He has known her since she was in THIRD GRADE. She is as close to me as a sister. He just kept saying things like, well, you all aren't kids anymore, blah blah blah. I told him absolutely not.

Then, about 4 days ago, I brought it up to my BFF. She told me that he had already asked her last week & she didn't know how to bring it up to me. Long story short, she's disgusted, creeped out & uncomfortable around him now (for the exact same reasonings I had stated).

So, I didn't say anything to him because I was trying to calm down & weigh my words carefully.

Last night he calls & talks to me about something stupid (frogs & text messaging). Then out of the CLEAR BLUE says, "you need to tell your friend ____ to sleep with me just once". Are you freaking kidding me????!!!!! I laid into him with both barrels.

I am completely beside myself now & don't know what to do or say to anyone about anything. I am so mad. Dad and I have never been "close" - he was an alcoholic until I was 23. He's been clean & sober for the last 16 years now, so that's no longer an excuse.

I'm 99.9% ready to cut all ties with him & say to h-e-double hockey sticks with him!

UGH!

[saylormama]

Oh my... I am sorry that he's doing that to you and putting you and your friend in that position. I would be upset too!

[kval07]

Ooh, now that's a new one! I'd be pretty pissed off too.

[uncommon]

Wow. I don't even know how to respond to that. Horribly inappropriate at any age. I don't think I could speak to my father if he said something like that to me.

[motherofmolly]

wow. that is all i can say is wow.

[StifflersMom]

Unfortunately, I have been in your shoes, only i was about 14/15 when my (mostly absent dad) thought his daughter was a way to get young girls to come around him, he started hitting on my friends, even went as far as kissing one (on the lips but no tongue) which totally freaked her out, and she wouldnt come around him anymore, no big shock, I didnt want to be around him anymore either. After a couple years and when my friends were of legal age, I started talking to him again, and he did the same thing, kept hitting on my then 21 year old friends.....digusting.....I havent spoken to my father in at least 9 years.....he was never a dad to me, so I really havent lost anything.....but he has...... I would tell your dad how you feel and if he continues this disgusting behavior cut him out..... hopefully you can talk some sense into him, so you dont have to take those drastic measures. I hope it works out for you.

[disabledvetswife]

Wow. I don't even know how to respond to that. Horribly inappropriate at any age. I don't think I could speak to my father if he said something like that to me.

pretty much where I am at....

[434Teresa]

The way I see it he has no respect for you!! Sorry but he sounds like a dirty old man to me.. This would totaly T me pff to.. At this point I just dont think I would even talk to him or want him around me. It would be one thing if he met someone that age and they liked each other but to talk this way and think this way about someone he knew when she was a tiny child is way pass disgusting and to tell you to tell her to sleep with him well is really out of line on his part and even worse since he already knew how you felt about him even asking her out.
He is a disgusting person for even asking you if it would be ok so he is way pasted disgusting now if you ask me..

[Macaela25]

If you can't speak to him, text him or email him something like this -

"You have gone completely over the line and both (friend) and I are completely revolted by your behavior. If you ever mention her name again, contact her in any way, or attempt this with any of my other friends, that will be the last time you will hear from me. Consider this your ONLY warning."

Then don't mention it again. If he's not an idiot, he'll learn his place.

[bali1228]

Well, given his age you may want to take into consideration that it may be the onset of some form of dementia{due to the alcohol abuse}. But, if he's just an a-hole{and let's face it, we all know them and some of them must have kids}then I would say this{keep in mind, I can be quite blunt}
"Dad, I spoke with {BFF} about hookin' up with you and she said that she'll have to decline your offer, unfortunately the sight of saggy old b@lls skeeve her out, unless they're attached to a big, thick......wallet .
She added that if she ever has a disfiguring accident you should look her up, as her standards will have probably dropped considerably...but not until then."
I'm pretty sure the subject will never come up again if you say that