Your opinion on baby shower etiquette please!

[morneau_grl27]

I think it's okay to have second baby showers, as long as you are only asking for things you really need. I know of one person who had a second shower. She had a son and was having a girl this time around. Her son was two when she found out she was having another one. I thought the shower was a fine idea, her registry was unbelievable though. She asked for a stroller, jumper, bouncer seat, swing, and stationary jumper all in pink, and this was her last baby. So in other words, she wanted brand new of everything for her daughter and then planned on garage saling it all afterwards. To me, that's tacky.

[MrsPinecone]

Originally Posted by morneau_grl27 To me, that's tacky.

To just about everyone, that's tacky.

[rrpate]

Originally Posted by amys As long as the mother isn't the one giving it - why can't someone else throw her one? No matter how many she has and what sex they are?

well its just my opinion.. any one can have a shower for any one they want.. but frankly i would get tired of donating to the same people . i have lots of friends and , 15 grand kids i give tons of gifts to my own grand kids.. if i got invited to every new preggo mom's shower i would need a fund raiser to help me with my mortgage.

[amys]

Originally Posted by rrpate well its just my opinion.. any one can have a shower for any one they want.. but frankly i would get tired of donating to the same people . i have lots of friends and , 15 grand kids i give tons of gifts to my own grand kids.. if i got invited to every new preggo mom's shower i would need a fund raiser to help me with my mortgage.

ya know - that's not a bad idea. If we all did this, maybe one day we would all be out of debt.

ok back to topic - I give less expensive gifts after the first one, because I can't afford to buy so much for them all.

[Macaela25]

I'd just like to reiterate, based on some previous comments, that the mother isn't throwing herself a shower. We. her friends, are throwing a surprise shower for her. This has nothing to do with greed on her part, just the generosity and good wishes of close friends wanting to make sure her needs are met.

I've been to several baby showers in the past where it was obvious that not every guest brought a gift. That is perfectly acceptable as well in our area/group. I suppose that, based on my question, it was assumed that this shower was all about dictating what gifts guests should bring. It's not that at all - we were simply trying to figure out what would make things easier for everyone involved.

I guess I'm just surprised that anyone would equate a baby shower with greed.

[JOURDYSMOM]

I said it is not offensive to put in a little note...

Then I read your post... IMHO there is no reason for her to need a new car seat. I can see her WANTING a double stroller maybe, but the systems are really expensive, and I think 2 girls only 2 years apart is not something that should be asked for.

have a diaper and wipe shower.

[justmama]

I recently gave a diaper/boys clothes shower for a couple at our church. It was a co-ed game night in honor of the couple and their 2nd child that was on the way. There children are 18 months apart give or take a week or so. It was a normal game night crowd. They loved it.

I wouldn't mind going to a shower for a second child, and having an idea of what the mother wants or needs, even if the children are 2 years or less apart.

[amys]

If it is a SURPRISE shower and indicated on the invitation as such, then put in a note that although she has many things already it would be lovely to add to her cupboards - or something along those lines. Surprise showers that the guest of honor knows nothing about are different.

[Macaela25]

Originally Posted by JOURDYSMOM I said it is not offensive to put in a little note... Then I read your post... IMHO there is no reason for her to need a new car seat. I can see her WANTING a double stroller maybe, but the systems are really expensive, and I think 2 girls only 2 years apart is not something that should be asked for. have a diaper and wipe shower.

Her original stroller/seat combo was a hand me down from another family that had already been through two previous children before her DD used it. It is really no longer in a safe, usable condition.

Since she is planning on having at least one more child after this one, I don't see where a group gift of a stroller would be over the top. As I said in a previous post, group gifts are common here.

[mrshowdy]

I was completely confused by the post where someone said that if the shower is after a medically necessary early birth that it is assumed that no gifts are needed? That makes zero sense. In most ways moms to preemies or NICU babies have more needs and less time to get those needs met. Did this strike anyone else odd?