Am I a "Bad Mom" if I use a Pack N Play instead of a crib?

[tmsmalley]

We have the Pack and Play Sport. I love it! I'd mail it to you but it's been through 2 kids and is hard to really clean (you have to take it outside and hose it off). We used it until our youngest was about 2 1/2. We did have a crib (got it for about $100 at TRU) and the crib is easier on your back, but there is no reason you can't use a pack and play if you want to. You may want a bassinette or moses basket when they're really little, then move to the P&P when they outgrow that about 3-4 months.

Something you can definitely lose is a changing table. We never got around to getting one at all. We never even got around to a pad on the dresser although we talked about it often enough lol. We changed them on the bed, on the couch, on the floor, in the crib. No problems.

You also don't need a swing (only about half of all babies like them). If you want to try one, look on craigslist, freecycle or a garage sale because they grow out of them very quickly. Highchair and exersaucer don't come into play until about 4-6 months so you can wait on those if you want. We got huge use out of a $20 no frills bouncy chair too. Nicole loved it (we even fed her in it before we got her high chair) and Jenny lived in it due to her severe reflux. Baby bath is another 50/50 thing (although you can find really cheap ones), don't need a bottle warmer or wipes warmer or diaper genie at all.

Definitely put a post out on your local freecycle and see what you can come up with! There's tons of surplus baby stuff out there that you don't have to spend money on. And tell your sister that you're incredibly stressed right now which is bad for the baby and she's not helping. You only need positive happy energy for her little niece. Play the pregnant momma (and post-partum momma) card to the hilt!

Tess

[mmb1996]

When my twins were born I had two cribs with the works just "because". The babies slept with us 99% of the time and forget about them sleeping alone in the crib, I swear they had to be touching each other to fall asleep.

My son was born two years later and he loved to sleep in his crib, we even got the other crib set up downstairs for naps and such.

Go with the pack n play since you will need it for travel anyways, down the road if you find you need a crib atleast you will have had some time to find a deal. I agree with the freecycle, I bet if you ask you will get one. I see baby stuff listed daily on ours and lots of requests granted also.

We bought so much junk with our babies and hardly used any of it. Go with the basics at first and keep your receipts. I wish I would of with 90% of the clothes I bought and got as gifts. I took the tags off and washed it all before the babies came and found out they like to be in their sleepers. Everytime I would dress them up they cried but as soon as I got them back in the soft little footed sleepers they were happy again. Also 0-3 month clothes is a joke, sneeze and they have outgrown it.

Go with your heart, as a mom you can't go wrong.

[VivaciousJewelz]

Originally Posted by tmsmalley We have the Pack and Play Sport. I love it! I'd mail it to you but it's been through 2 kids and is hard to really clean (you have to take it outside and hose it off). We used it until our youngest was about 2 1/2. We did have a crib (got it for about $100 at TRU) and the crib is easier on your back, but there is no reason you can't use a pack and play if you want to. You may want a bassinette or moses basket when they're really little, then move to the P&P when they outgrow that about 3-4 months. Something you can definitely lose is a changing table. We never got around to getting one at all. We never even got around to a pad on the dresser although we talked about it often enough lol. We changed them on the bed, on the couch, on the floor, in the crib. No problems. You also don't need a swing (only about half of all babies like them). If you want to try one, look on craigslist, freecycle or a garage sale because they grow out of them very quickly. Highchair and exersaucer don't come into play until about 4-6 months so you can wait on those if you want. We got huge use out of a $20 no frills bouncy chair too. Nicole loved it (we even fed her in it before we got her high chair) and Jenny lived in it due to her severe reflux. Baby bath is another 50/50 thing (although you can find really cheap ones), don't need a bottle warmer or wipes warmer or diaper genie at all. Definitely put a post out on your local freecycle and see what you can come up with! There's tons of surplus baby stuff out there that you don't have to spend money on. And tell your sister that you're incredibly stressed right now which is bad for the baby and she's not helping. You only need positive happy energy for her little niece. Play the pregnant momma (and post-partum momma) card to the hilt! Tess

Gosh, Tess, you've already done a LOT for me! I almost feel like I should name my daughter after you!

We got a really nice changing table on Craigslist for only $20. The only reason I even bought it though was because it had extra storage AND folds into a small table when you're not using it as a changing table. I am extremely proud of that find. All I had to do was disinfect it and clean it with my own little combo of Lysol and Spray N Wash, and it shines just like new!

My sister is letting me borrow her bassinet and she's also letting me borrow her baby bath tub. I talked to her last night and told her she was stressing me out and that if I decided to do things differently from her, that she would just have to live with it or not be a part of her niece's life. I was surprised when she quickly backed down.

She said she bought me a microwave bottle sterilizer b/c she said it was save me a lot of time boiling the bottles and that when she tried washing hers in the dishwater, her daughter wouldn't drink milk out of that bottle since all of the soap didn't come out. She also said she saw the cutest purple outfit (we all know how I LOVE purple) with baby Minnie and Mickey Mouse on it, and she couldn't resist buying that, too. I told her that was fine.

We'll see how long this lasts with her. She hasn't been NEARLY as bossy as she was when I was younger and first went to college (she was bad, REALLY bad). I think it helps that I keep standing up to her, but she's always felt the need to offer her opinions whenever I "embark on a new stage of life" since I "don't have a mother to guide" me, lol. But I'm glad she's backed off for now. She DID say last night, though, that she was going to come visit again before the baby is born because "You seem like you need some help getting organized" which is code for "I can't believe all the crap you piled up in your closets!!!" I should wait until I'm 8 months pregnant, than ask her to come down and clean my house. I bet she'd do it, too.

We're just going to get the PNP that I want (currently on sale at Wal-Mart!!) and if we need a crib later, we'll deal with it then.

[mommytaylor]

We used a pack n play for the first 4 months and then my mother stuck her nose in our business and bought a crib for DS. The only benefit was that it converted to a toddler bed so we didn't need to buy DS one.

We have 4 pack n plays. One at each grandma's house for when we visit, one in the kitchen that we bought loved for outside use last summer. And a

I do like our changing table, personally. Easier on my back and DS recognizes it as a diaper change area, so he isn't squirmy and doesn't try to escape as he does when I change him anywhere else.

My mother bought DS a swing. He only liked it and showed any interest a month ago or so at 16 months when we converted it to a rocker.

Use a tote for a baby bath, like the ones you use for storage or moving Easy as pie and likely costs nothing as most people have one around! Never used a bottle warmer (breastfed) or wipes warmer. DS never complained. We just used hot tap water in a bowl to heat a bottle. No biggie. Also, a diaper genie is just a way for you to spend money. I have a trashcan in the kitchen. Every diaper makes it in there right after the diaper change. It becomes a routine.

Our freecycle gave us our stroller, highchair, one of the pack n plays, a bassinet (which we re-freecycled as we didn't find it that useful compared to the pack n play).

I do personally feel that the best investments we made from newborn to 6 months: pack n plays, mitten/no scratch shirts, a handful of swaddling blankets, a mobile (they make ones to attach to the pack n plays), an electric breastpump and a baby carrier. Total we spent $125. Check your local garage sales for pack n plays

Try the Moby Wrap, Inc. for infants. Good price, and the wraps are soooooo wonderful for infants to toddlers...we're big baby carriers here, or you can check out ebay too. And if you breastfeed, manual pumps are horrible IMO. I found myself so exhausted in the first month or two that putting effort to manually pump wasn't worth it, I'd rather sleep. Try craigslist or ebay for cheaper ones.

I recommend Pampers Swaddlers for newborns. Check out diapers.com they do $10 off your first order and take manufacterer coupons if you mail them in. Often have sales on the swaddlers too! Free shipping over $49...

Whew hope that helps!
Ashley

[tmsmalley]

Theresa Marie which gives you options for Tess, Tessa, Teri (Terri, Terry), Tracy and several other variations :)

Glad you got sis to back down. Keep doing that. She means well, but too bad, you have to set limits. If you do buy a crib, definitely get one that converts. Both of ours (long story, re: move from hell, had to buy a second crib when the movers destroyed the first one), were about $100, one from TRU, one from Target, and both convert all the way to a full size. That way you can pass it down to the next baby or use it for this one as long as you need to. Get a mattress that has a plasticized wipe off finish to it. Much easier to work with than a mattress cover that just goes on top of it. You'll also only need a few sheets. 3 is usually enough unless you have to take your laundry out to do. One to wash, one to have on, one spare. I remember thinking I needed like 10 sets but nope.

Remember, you're not officially a 'bad mom' until your co-worker overhears you as you're all getting on a conference call. It was 6:30 am my time since we work in different time zones. Day care wasn't open yet, dh had an early meeting and wasn't here to corral small children. They overheard me telling Nicole and Jenny that if they would just be quiet and watch Mary Poppins while Mommy is on the phone that I'd bring them popsickles to eat (at 6:30 am no less). Professionalism and motherhood took a hit in one sentence! Fortunately, the person that overheard me has 3 herself so it wasn't as bad as it could have been!

We always joke about how this or that thing is another thing on the kids' lists for their future therapist. Oh well! Give yourself a break. You'll be fine.

Tess

[VivaciousJewelz]

Originally Posted by tmsmalley Theresa Marie which gives you options for Tess, Tessa, Teri (Terri, Terry), Tracy and several other variations :) Glad you got sis to back down. Keep doing that. She means well, but too bad, you have to set limits. If you do buy a crib, definitely get one that converts. Both of ours (long story, re: move from hell, had to buy a second crib when the movers destroyed the first one), were about $100, one from TRU, one from Target, and both convert all the way to a full size. That way you can pass it down to the next baby or use it for this one as long as you need to. Get a mattress that has a plasticized wipe off finish to it. Much easier to work with than a mattress cover that just goes on top of it. You'll also only need a few sheets. 3 is usually enough unless you have to take your laundry out to do. One to wash, one to have on, one spare. I remember thinking I needed like 10 sets but nope. Remember, you're not officially a 'bad mom' until your co-worker overhears you as you're all getting on a conference call. It was 6:30 am my time since we work in different time zones. Day care wasn't open yet, dh had an early meeting and wasn't here to corral small children. They overheard me telling Nicole and Jenny that if they would just be quiet and watch Mary Poppins while Mommy is on the phone that I'd bring them popsickles to eat (at 6:30 am no less). Professionalism and motherhood took a hit in one sentence! Fortunately, the person that overheard me has 3 herself so it wasn't as bad as it could have been! We always joke about how this or that thing is another thing on the kids' lists for their future therapist. Oh well! Give yourself a break. You'll be fine. Tess

That's hysterical. I probably would have done the same thing. Maybe I'll tack a "Tessa" on to the end of my DD's name and she'll be Caroline Reneé Tessa Williams, LOL.

[jhwkgrl]

Our 9 month old is still sleeping in the pack n' play in our bedroom, and I seriously doubt he'll be scarred for life or anything. I do have to say that he's about to really outgrow it, at which point we'll put him in his crib in his own room. But there just wasn't room for a crib in our room, and I liked having him nearby at night. So all I would say is you're going to need a crib eventually, unless you can find one of those European pack n' plays that are more similar in length to a crib.

[tmsmalley]

The pack and play sport version is much larger than the traditional pack and play because it is a hexagon shape. Our two kids slept in it at various times well past the age of 2 (and dh is 6'3" so my kids are NOT small).

The benefit of some of the other pack and plays however is that they come with a built in bassinette and changing table feature which can solve a bunch of issues in one shot. All in all, I just love Graco and LOVE our Pack 'n Play.

Tess

[AngB21]

We had our DD sleeping downstairs (with one of us on the couch) in the pack and play for the first 6 months. She has special needs and would cry nonstop for what seemed like days at a time. The only way other people in the house could get any sleep was to keep her downstairs and to have one of us on the couch. Not fun but it worked for us.

Some of you will cringe when I tell ya this one. My nephew is 2 1/2 and since day 1 he has always slept in a bouncer and still does. When he was a few months old he figured out how to bounce himself by kicking his leg. He's a stalky kid so he's already snapped the metal bars on three of them. He has a crib but my DS doesn't want to sleep train him until the newborn is older so that he doesn't wake him up.

I guess moral of the story, do whatever works for you to keep everyone happy and well rested!

[bubbsguy221]

If you want a pack and play then i say go ahead. I had a crib for all 3 of mine but that doesn't mean you need to use one. Really if your sister said you had to breastfeed would you HAVE to? of course not. Parenting is a series of choices based on what works for your family.Some moms work and dad stays home (that is how my DD wants it to work if she ever has kids she is only 18 now) then others mom stays home and dad works. I believe as long as children are safe and loved then you are doing the right thing. I would try not to let her stress you out. Relax and be the wonderful mom you are meant to be.