Who wants a rep? Make me smile

[chitownmelli]

Cuz I feel like repping people - and smiling. Had a rough day. Share a story, one liner, funny quote, joke, anything at all that would make YOU smile - which in turn will probably make me smile, and I will rep you :)

This is just something for fun everyone, so please, have a good time with it :) I'll rep until I run out and then start again when I have more to give

[meggers]

Uhhhhh...

Oh the pressure!

I'll be back...

[Jessi]

What makes me happy/smile right now is the fact that the HHH Auction is at $100!!!

[cheynesnana]

Uhhhhh...

Oh the pressure!

I'll be back...

Waits while meggers consults her Joke-A-Day book....

[nrpeace17]

[jenniferkentwood]

What made me happy today was the cooler weather and a nice sun shining out!
: )

[Dengineer]

My dad forwarded this to me the other day--some of them made me LOL!

Irrefutable laws of life--

1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with
grease, your nose will begin to itch & you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll
to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a
busy signal & someone always answers.

5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work
because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat
tire.

6. Law of Variation - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one
you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works
every time).

7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the
telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine
won't work, it will.

10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely
proportional to the reach.

11.. Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose
seats are furthest from the aisle always arrive last. They are the ones
who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the
toilet & who leave early before the end of the performance or the game
is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have
long gangly legs or big bellies & stay to the bitter end of the
performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee
is cold.

13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker
room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly
sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the
newness & cost of the carpet or rug.

15. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know
what you are talking about.

16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, chances are they're ugly.

17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to
the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better... don't make
an appointment and you'll stay sick.

[chitownmelli]

I repped you jokesters to here, thank you for the smiles, keep em coming :)

[ioncewasamjskeptic]

6. Law of Variation - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one
you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works
every time). This should be named- If you see Lorrie on the road.... EVERY darn time!

[CouponQueen23]

Here's a joke I was sent one day I laughed so hard when I read it I hope it give you a good laugh too :)

A teacher gave her kids lifesavers. The kids began to identify the flavors by their colors - red/cherry, yellow/lemon, green/lime, purple/grape and so on. Finally the teacher gave them all Honey flavored lifesavers. None of the kids could identify the taste. She said, "I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father." One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled, "Oh my God, they're a--holes!