30 and No Long-term relationships -what do you make of this?

[lasab]

Dog, you have all the time in the world. I know you told yourself you would be married by the time you were 30 but life has dealt you a different hand.

My advise, let life take its course and stop comparing yourself to others around you. When you least expect to find love that is when it usually gets dropped in your lap.

Don't settle, just have fun and it will happen naturally when the time is right.

Very well said. I completly agree

[darkwing932]

There is nothing at all wrong with that and anyone that would judge needs to mind their own business.

[Lori63]

There is nothing at all wrong with that and anyone that would judge needs to mind their own business.

I was just thinking-'to each his own'. All kinds of people out there

[joshmamabear]

I have a GF who's now 45 and her last long term relationship was a decade ago. She's getting worried but since I know her, I keep reassuring her that she is a good woman and will be a good partner to an equally wonderful man. She's getting worried her biological clock is ticking so she might just grab any guy that shows interest in her. I said, "NO WAY! do you realize you're looking for trouble if you do that"?

Getting into a "forced" relationship just because you're pressured is worst than being alone. I told her that she has a lot of things going for her so she might as well enjoy her life. Being in a relationship is not the be-all and end-all of everything; it shouldn't define the kind of person she is. Should the right man come to her life @ whatever age, she should be glad, BUT if no one comes along, she should still be happy with her singleblessedness.

[shetlandponyluvr]

Yep, perfectly normal. Pretty darned smart too. A friend of mine was 38 when she got married. He was her first long term relationship too.

[bali1228]

Good men are hard to find, I got married at nearly 29. Men take longer to mature and settle down, so if you're not willing to compromise it will take a little longer to find him....and that's totally OK! You should never compromise your standards because of worry, none of us have a crystal ball. When I reached your age I became very comfortable in my own skin. The old cliche "when you stop looking you'll find him" is so true. I decided I had enough of the losers and stayed single for 2 years, and just concentrated on doing the stuff that made me happy. I took up fencing and traveled by myself...and that's when I met DH. Happiness and confidence is very attractive. DH swore up and down he wasn't the marrying type, and the woman he had just broke it off with had lived with him for 6 years with no ring. He married me within 6 months of meeting me...when you know, you know!

[Gertie2u]

Good men can be hard to find, and sometimes they can be hard to recognize when they are right in front of you. Hence how I ended up not spending my life with a great guy until I was in my 30s. And his parents were almost 30 when they finally wed. Is it possible one of them did love someone, but was prevented from sharing their life with them by their strong convictions? I have a friend who is still single in her late 40s. She admits she was just so in love with a guy she met when she was 20. She was still living at home and they had a bit of a whirlwind courtship going on with wonderful fun dates every day for about 2 weeks. Then her dad found out and had a talk with her about dating "heathen unbelievers". No one since has ever lived up to how he made her feel loved, appreciated, cared-for, and adored so she has finally given up in the last few years. I tell her she can't give up, who's going to be a wild woman in the old folks home with me?

Also possible they aren't actually that interested in men, but are prevented from making other choices by their religious beliefs. I knew a couple of sisters like that when I was younger. They were the stereotypical old maiden lady teachers sharing a house, or so it seemed to me at the time. Looking back, I don't think either one of them could possibly have been 40 yet at the time I knew them. Take pity on me, I was pretty young at the time.

While I can agree, it is their own business, seeing as they are your sisters I can understand that you may have concern for them. Also, you didn't mention it, but I assume they sometimes say things around you about being lonely or wishing to meet people. I think no matter what, if you have standards and a busy life, it can be hard, and I am sure you want to support them the best way you can. I would say for the sister living with you, try to remember to carve out some time for her to go do some things she enjoys and keep an eye out for activities she might enjoy but not have heard about in your area that you can mention to her. She may not meet someone, but at least she will get out a bit and enjoy herself. Not much you can do for the other sister except encourage her to go out when she is able probably.