Switching to cash only, well kind of...

[pitbaby]

I have been kicking the idea of going mostly cash only. I say mostly is because we have automatic payments that come out of our account every month and I prefer to pay my bills online that aren't automatic. This keeps the book keeping end clearer and easier for me but my DH is presenting a problem. He tends to treat our debit cards as credit cards, which we don't have credit cards and I prefer to keep it that way. I am strict on my budgeting and in theory should be able to put money into savings for an EF but that never seems to pan out. So I am trying to consider my options because I am pretty sure I am going to have to pry his card out of his cold dead hands and to put him on strictly cash except for his expense/gas account is going to be a problem.

I know most of the problem is ease of use and I am mildly worried about the bill money being in the bank and since he would have access no matter what that it might backfire on me. It also seems to me that since I coupon, now a little more hardcore then I did the assumption is the money that is saved can be spent whatever way. We have had conversations about how the budget works and what we have to pay out and what should be left over at the end of the month and those numbers never match up and I am starting to think it is a too many cooks in the kitchen thing.
I have cut my shopping budget from $550 and month down to $350-$400 give or take a little, I have scaled down every expense we have and this wasn't to long ago and once we saw the numbers he went out and picked up a payment on a new vehicle. Not saying it wasn't a needed but that added to an already dysfunctional set of numbers.

So my idea is to figure out exactly what goes out in bills both automatic and paid by me online again because of course now we have the car payment and a nice huge jump on car insurance. Once I have that number break it over the 2 pay periods and take the rest of the money out and take care what needs to be taken care of. I want to have an EF and I am starting to think I am going to have to start socking that money away in my personal savings account that he doesn't have access to nor does he know about, which has bailed us out before and he has no clue, assumed I borrowed and he would give it back to me to payback. I know that is sneaky to a certain degree but my first husband really taught me that it is something that is needed when only 1 person knows how to balance a checkbook.
Does anyone do all or mostly cash and how does it work out for you? I am trying to keep things positive and see the light at the end of the tunnel and I am sure once my teenagers are off on their own things might change a bit but for the moment I would like to have a plan in action that he becomes used to and sticks with even when the kids leave the nest.

[junkbell]

We have been on a cash budget for about a year and it has worked well for us. We have a certain amount for gas, groceries, eating out etc. With gas costs we have adjusted it a little bit but it really works for us. Be sure to sit down and discuss it and agree to revisit periodically.

Don't forget to have a little bit of "mad money" money that neither of you need to tell the other one what you are spending it on - even like $5 - you might even load it on a prepaid visa and confiscate the debit card.

Best of luck!

[joshmamabear]

I agree with you that one has to be careful while paying with debit cards. They're just like checks we issue and we should make sure there's enough balance each time we swipe it for payments either @ POS or when we issue checks. Signing up for automatic drafts is tricky since they will not notify you when they're taking out the money. It is assumed that you have money available when they withdraw payments.

One should always make sure they know their balance because if they have no overdraft protection and pay for items when they're already in the negative,it will mean NSF fees PLUS what you owe that the bank paid for to keep your checks from bouncing.

This is ONE advantage of using CCs, you are not likely to get overdraft fees although you still have to watch your spending so you don't spend beyond 30% of your credit limit or worse, max out should you go into a shopping spree. It is easy to negotiate with your bank if you didn't sign up for overdraft protection BECAUSE if an automatic draft does not get paid, they may still charge you with NSF but it is easy to have it waived (provided you don't do it all the time ) since the bank is not out any money. You're still liable to pay the company you owe the money but that is strictly between you and the company w/o the bank involvement.

Another option for you to look into is instead of automatic draft, why not sign up for them to notify you when the statement is up and you're given the choice to choose the checking account to pay it. That way, you can make a quick check of your balance to make sure there's enough to cover the payment. That way, you'll not be charged NSF by your bank.

I still prefer to use CCs for the cash back perks I don't get from using cash. As long as I pay all my balance each month, it is just like spending cash for me, only better since I not just get a receipt but also get some GCs as perks just for spending. M2C.

[pitbaby]

I have lucked out with the auto-drafts since I have had them for years and know what days they are coming out. It is mainly the unexpected surprise of a trip DH takes to Lowe's that is supposed to cost $50 ends up being $150 and I think the cash only dealings would cut down on that plus he would know exactly what is there and what isn't. If I know I have $200 to go food shopping with my goal is not to spend the whole amount but try to get the best deal I can get on what we need so I am thinking if he says I need $60 to go to Lowe's if that's all he has he cant spend more. Or at least that's my story and I'm sticking to it..lol

CC's where great when we had them but decided to cut them up and pay them off when DH got hurt and lost his job a couple of years back. Payments were always made on time and all the stuff that credit companies love. Even with the way things currently are my bills are never late, I actually pay over what the mortgage company asks for so my principal goes down even if it is just a little bit and we will never go without food or anything else that we might need. I just want to get ahead of the curve and put money away.

We both have our little things that we do for ourselves but I think it is a difference in attitude and I hope that cash only would work. I put aside a certain amount and that is what I have to "splurge" with and it is up to me whether or not I spend it.

Thank you for the input. I wanted to see how other people do it and if it truly works for them.

[Merczilla]

Hubby hands over his checks and I do all the bill paying, shopping, etc. There are a couple of bills I pay online, so if they're the ones I'm paying, I deposit that amount in my account. We don't keep "extra" money in our accounts. We pay cash for everything and other than the online bills, don't use debit or credit cards. If the cash in our pockets isn't enough for whatever it is, then oh well.

Been operating this way for years. When ATT decided they'ed no longer accept cash payments in the store (say what? Who refuses cash?), we switched cell phone carriers (many years ago).

Cash works for us. What isn't in any bank, no one knows about.

[434Teresa]

what I would do is open a another account in my name at another bank for the bills and let him keep that one and the debit card to use and only put him so much money in there every week or two. If he is on board with your saving money then this really should not be a problem for him. I love my hubby but he has no clue to what it takes to keeping this house going the way it dose and he likes it that way. He works and hands me the money to take care of things with. He knows that he could not do what I do and he tells me this all the the time. He knows what bills we have and such he just dont want to deal with it and if he did any extra money would not be saved he is to kind hearted for his own good. I know that your hubby and others on here may not agree with this but this way he wins and so do you.

We have debit cards but NO credit cards..when the cash on hand or cash in our account for spending is gone will thats it, unless its something that pops up like my A.C tearing up this week that comes out of savings. No criedit other then our house but then there is monthly bills I cant find away to get rid of...oh man those power bills, phone,internet,dish and insurance add up even with the cheapest that you can get with no extras..

[434Teresa]

I have lucked out with the auto-drafts since I have had them for years and know what days they are coming out. It is mainly the unexpected surprise of a trip DH takes to Lowe's that is supposed to cost $50 ends up being $150 and I think the cash only dealings would cut down on that plus he would know exactly what is there and what isn't. If I know I have $200 to go food shopping with my goal is not to spend the whole amount but try to get the best deal I can get on what we need so I am thinking if he says I need $60 to go to Lowe's if that's all he has he cant spend more. Or at least that's my story and I'm sticking to it..lol

If you give him cash and he still has the debit card it will do you no good. He would just spend the $150 on the debit card and bring you back the $60 cash.......he has to be on board with what you are doing to make this work.

[pitbaby]

Merczilla- The only credit stuff was originally the house and when he went out and bought his car my head almost exploded. So now it is the house and his car. As to the everyday bills I have those down as much as I possibly can and I wish I could figure out how to cut them all together but the folks in my house seem to think they need power and all those other things..lol

434Teresa - I have my own little savings account that my paycheck gets deposited in and I save a little here and there. He has access to the joint account and he has an account with its own card that his gas money gets put into so that it is one less thing that I have to figure out and it is easier for him to submit for his gas and mileage on base. Nice perk from his job would be nicer if they were consistent with the pay out date. Upside to that is he always puts it in the joint account instead of back into his account because it is considered extra money.

He is always agreeable and on board when I say we are going to do this or we are going to do that because he knows he isn't very good with money and it usually works up until Thanksgiving/Christmas time. Once the holidays are over it takes me about 2-3 months to snap him out of it.

So now that I have gone on here is my plan.

Money for bills stays in the account. Anything after that comes out and we get what we have to get food, etc. If there is anything left over it gets split between the holiday fund and the savings. Anything for savings I am putting in my own little savings account so it gets the tiny bit of interest the local bank offers me. Once the holidays are over whatever is left out of the holiday fund gets split between the next years holiday fund and the savings. He can keep his expense account and his card for that but he has to give me the debit card for the joint account. Mileage check gets deposited and when it clears it get pulled out same as the paycheck. If there is something that we need to get that has to be ordered over the net if I cant send them a money order I will put the cash in the bank and make the purchase once I get home. Cash at the bank is instant and the joint account is at a bank that's 30 minutes away which also gives me time to rethink my purchase but I am pretty sure if I am willing to do the hour drive I want or need whatever it is I am ordering.

Thanks for the input now I have to put my plan into action and see how much of an issue he is going to give me if any.