DH is thinking of joining the Marines

[jillibean_1978]

My brother just finished his 4 yrs active with the Marines. I think that he is a better person because of them. Living a military life can be hard.
When my brother was in high school he told us he was joining the Army. I was cool with that. Then when he signed the dotted line...it was with the Marines. I will admit I was scared. I didn't know if it would change him. It did change him a little bit...but for the better. Not that he was a bad person before!!! LOL
And have you ever heard the saying "A man is only as strong as the woman behind" ? LOL

[puakinikini]

I personally could not happily live a typical military lifestyle. I think it is important to really consider how military service impacts your family.

I admire people who can so it successfully, but marriage and raising kids is stressful enough without long deployments, frequent moves, living away from extended family, poor financial reimbursement for literally putting your life on the line, etc. My DH occassionally travels for business and it is really hard being without him for those short time periods (3 days to 2 weeks), I can't imagine months.

I have many friends who are military wives and they all say that they question whether it is worth it. Most of them married their DH when they were already enrolled so they knew what they were getting into, and a few of them came from military families. My dad served in Vietnam before I was born, seeing the impact of combat on him, I am glad that he was out of the military during my childhood (of course, the damage was already done).

This is just my one opinionn - I think if you were already considering the Navy then you already accepted the ramifications of the military lifestyle and that your DH joining the Marines may be really good for you. Good luck in whatever the two of you decide.

[vickib50]

I don't have any experience as a military spouse, but, I want to tell you this; my younger cousin entered the Marines after high school. I don't think he thought of it as a career at the time, but, as he progressed and rose in rank, he kept re-upping. He is now closing in on 20 years. He makes over $60,000 a year and is a First Sargent. The next step is Sgt. Major and then you've capped out. His retirement, if he leaves after 20 years, is going to be more than $3,000 a month to just sit on his butt! He will have first choice over other applicants for any government job and will draw his military pension while he works at another job for at least as much money as he was making when he retires.

I don't believe there is anything else in the world that will bring a tear to my eyes quicker than seeing him in his dress uniform. He's a strong man, physically, mentally, and emotionally. He is just phenomenal.

Think about what being a Marine means and try to balance it out for yourself. I think I can understand being young and fairly new at being married and worried about the deployments. Try, though, to look to the future and see how secure you will be financially when all around you are struggling just to stay afloat. And, no, I don't think your decision should just be based on the financial rewards. No, I'm not that shallow. I'm just saying that the benefits are something to think about. They are as much a part of the decision-making process as all the other issues you may have.

[DogMom1974]

Hi ~ I just read all of the post and felt I really need to post to you.. I met my hubby when I was 26 , we met online he had been in the army for around 16 years then , I lived in Florida, him in Tn we talked for 6 months while he was in Kuwait then I flew for the first time right after 9/11 to meet him when he returned home to Fort Campbell ( Clarksville, Tn) ... we were married 4 months later , then we got stationed in Georgia ...within a month of marrying he was deployed back to Kuwait for 11 months.. I knew noone, have no children and managed just fine.. Throughout the years he has been deployed over and over We have now been married for 7 years together almost 8 and I have actually "seen him" about a year and a half ouf that.. He has been deployed to Kuwait 6 times, Afghanistan once, Iraq twice and so on... He just returned home from Iraq after a 15 month tour on Thanksgiving day.... I have spent many many holidays anniversaries, and so on completely alone with no family or friends other than some army wives that I really had nothing in common with... But ya know what? I am happy for it because it made me a stronger woman.. Those that say that they could never do t , can really surprise themselves if they are actually in the situation.. I never watch the news, read the papers and advise family or friends not to tell me what is going on in the world when he is deployed..I just feel numb and stay busy and get through it.. I would only cry the day he left and the day he returned knowing that if I showed that I was weak that it would only make his job harder if he was worrying about me at home..I would make a list the day he would leave of all of the things I am gonna do while he was gone ( paint the kitchen cabinets, work out and dream of the day and outfit I would be wearing when I go to pick him up a year from now) ... One thing any military wife knows or is forced to learn is that the military will always come first and that does not mean that he / or she loves you any less.. You have to not be jealous or have trust issues and keep busy and by doing that you will both get through the deployments and military life.. My husband is a cheif warrant officer 3 and has now had 22 years in and is planning to retire in Feb 09 .. Although it is wonderful that he is getting out, I am so proud of him and the sacrifices that we have been through that have made us appreciate every second that we have together.. Keep that in mind , if he does end up joining the service.. It is not for everyone and unless you are in it or married to it.. then a recuiter cannot paint a picture of day to day life of being a soldier/ sailor or airman. Talk about it and weigh the good and bad.. There is alot of emotional support for military families and it is actually a good thing.. The money and benefits are great.. Hubby would make an additional $3000 a month during deployments and he was still able to call... I wish you the best , whatever your decision may be! P>S if you get pregnant , they will still deploy him! I have seen many wives think otherwise.. I am here if you need me~ Janet

[clarkestep]

I'm really really late in joining in here but here's my 2 cents.... I have a Navy son(just got back from being stationed in Japan for almost 3 yrs this past week going to Jacksonville, FL next month). Before joining the Navy he thought of the Marines.

Here's my advice based on what the Marine recruiter told us. If your husband wants to go to combat, like 100% sure he wants to go..... then support him as he wants to fight and protect our country. If he's not 100 %SURE he wants to go to combat, then he needs to pick the Navy. The recruiter tried so hard to blow smoke up my son's butt it was not funny. Basically the Marines are very stretched right now. We've got about 1/3 in a war zone, 1/3 preparing to go to a war zone, and 1/3 getting ready to come back from a war zone. What this boils down to is that your husband will have almost a 100% chance to go to a war zone in the next 1 1/2 yrs if he joins the Marines. If this is what you both want for him and your family, then I say support that man. If not, just be aware of what is really going on in the world. That recruiter had told my son that he qualified to be infantry and to shoot and to drive. I stopped him while he was talking to my son and told him the whole truth.... that he WOULD be going to war and that he WOULD be the get away driver or the one shooting the gun while the other person drove. I told him that we would support him all the way if that is what he felt God wanting him to do. I told him that I wanted him to know the whole truth, not just what bits and pieces the recruiter was telling him. This was a huge decision he was about to make and I wanted him to make an educated decision. Needless to say, the recruiter got pinhead quit and then my son ended up signing with the Navy.... as an Air Traffic Controller! Humph, tell me my boy ain't smart!

I pray your hubby makes the best decision for your family and for our country!

[Mothernature]

My dad served in Vietnam before I was born, seeing the impact of combat on him, I am glad that he was out of the military during my childhood (of course, the damage was already done).

My FIL served in Nam. I hear and see how it changed him.

My grandfather, father, and uncle served in the armed forces. It was really hard on my grandmother because she had three sons and he was gone for years at a time. My grandfather was at Pearl Harbor.

Based on all four recounts of their experiences, I also second the opinion to really consider how the armed forces will impact your life.