I'm SO tired of people's rude comments about my pregnancy!!

[VivaciousJewelz]

So, I've only been pregnant about 15 weeks and I told everyone at work in mid-December. For the most part, the reaction has been positive, especially from my two female bosses who are awesome.

I haven't expected any special treatment, and my quality of work is consistent with what it was before I was pregnant (I spoke with my boss to confirm this), but there are some people in the office who are making rude comments about how I must think I'm "special" because I'm pregnant, and it's really frustrating me.

First- After I found out I was pregnant, I started drinking more water which resulted in me going to the bathroom every 20 minutes or so. Well, the bathrooms are right in front of where half the office can see who goes in and out, so someone made a comment about "you're spending an abnormal amount of time in the bathroom." Fine, whatever, I let that go.

Second-Obviously I have more doctors visits and have been out of the office a little more. I've been consious about scheduling my appointments at convenient times and haven't missed more than 1 full day of work total. But when someone overheard me telling my boss I am going to be out for 2 hours tomorrow and later they said to me "If only we all could have such an easy excuse for ditching work." That made me mad b/c I get the same amount of sick/vacation leave that everyone starts out with, but I let that go, too.

The final straw came today. They did some painting in my building and because of the heating system, the fumes are circulating around the entire building. Eventually, I started getting a headache and then, 2 separate people with asthma problems asked me to call maintenance because the fumes were triggering their asthma attacks. I decided to call because of that, and also (with me being pregnant) it's not a good idea for me to inhale fumes, or anyone else for that matter either b/c more than one person complained about getting a headache.

So I called maintenance and the only thing they could do was turn off the central heat, so I said fine, go ahead. About 30 min later, someone comes up to me and tells me it's cold in the office (which it's not. It's a bit less warm, but we're hardly freezing to death). So I tell her to get a blanket, since we keep blankets here. She asks me why they turned it off, but before I could explain about the other people it was bothering she said "Oh, I bet you had them do it b/c you're pregnant and think you're so special, everything should just revolve around you."

Luckily, one of the people with asthma heard what she said and stuck up for me and explained that it had been bothering her asthma, but I felt that was just SO rude.

I've NEVER acted like I was extra special or anything because I'm pregnant. Most people here at work are being really nice about it all, but these couple of people are just grating on my nerves. I have asked someone for help lifting something a time or two, but I only asked one of my coworkers who specifically volunteered to help me with the lifting around here while I'm pregnant. I don't expect everyone to be thrilled and extra nice to me, but is it too much to ask that they not make blatantly RUDE comments?? Being pregnant is hard enough!

Anyway, thanks for letting me rant.

[tmsmalley]

Honey, just ignore this stuff and don't take it so personally. People make stupid comments all the time, they just tick off pregnant women more because you're pregnant.

The responses go like this:

"you're spending an abnormal amount of time in the bathroom."

Yep, just wait until we get further down the track and I've got 8lbs of baby sitting on my bladder. I hear it gets REALLY fun then!


"If only we all could have such an easy excuse for ditching work."

Oh, you can! Just get pregnant! (If they're over 50 or male this is even better!)

"Oh, I bet you had them do it b/c you're pregnant and think you're so special, everything should just revolve around you."

Actually, I had them do it so that they wouldn't get a huge OSHA fine and end up evacuating the building due to the fumes.

As a side note, I'm a disaster planner and we evacuated one of our buildings for 4 complete business days a few months ago over exactly this issue. We share the building with others and one of the other tenants had some work done, painted with oil based paints in a sealed building and by Monday morning we were done for. They were not happy when we presented them with the bill!

And, I have to say also, do you work with 12 year olds? This sounds like an incredibly immature bunch. Write down who said what when and if it continues, talk to your boss about the hostile work environment that you're experiencing since you've been pregnant and how surprised you are that this is happening. He should jump all over that and the people monitoring your potty breaks and doctor's appointments.

Hang in there!
Tess

[ShoppingCartDiva]

Go with the flow. Tell 'em, "Yup, I'm special."
I bet that'll leave them open-mouthed and gaping. ;)


Don't worry about it. For some reason pregnancy seems to be one of those things people think they can chime in about, no matter what aspect of it.

[Mothernature]

I have to wonder how many of these people smoke...

[dliver316]

That REALLY ticks me off!!! You are pregnant and there are going to be certain things you can and can not do for the safety of you and your baby. I know you probably dont want to cause strife at your office, but if someone else makes a rude comment like "you think you're special," you may want to tell them if they have a problem with you putting the interests of your unborn baby first then they can take it up with your boss.
Some people are clueless! Just ignore them and know that you are doing the right things for your baby!

[ADRealty]

I would just agree with them and say yes, i'm special and i want more priviliges. Could you do me the favor and go pick up my prints and when you return, can you please make 5 copies of this form? LOL Oh, and don't be hating on me cuz i'm special. OR YOU CAN SAY THIS, yes, I'm pregnant, and may God bless you as well 5 times over. bada bing!!! You hang in there girl, don't let these fools get to you, this affects your baby, and those people aren't worth it!

[mrsjschultz]

PP can be so rude.

Have you ever posted over the TheBump??

They have a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd tri board =) Then a 0-6, 6-12 month board.

It's where I spend much of my day...#2 is due at the beginning of August.

Come join us...not sure if I could post that...but I did =)

[jkelstaten]

Yep, for some reason people just feel they can be extra rude when someone gets pregnant. I don't know why, it's just this phenomenon that occurs.

For the most part I would just try to let it roll off your back (easier said than done with the hormones involved...lol). However, if it really makes you uncomfortable, I would do like the pp said and keep a log so that you can show it to your boss.

As a warning, the comments tend to get worse the further along you get. They'll comment on you gaining too much weight, not enough, say you look like you're having twins cuz your so big, all that and more. So practice some good comebacks that make them look stupid and then hopefully they'll get the point.

One guy (my Dh's cousin) said I was getting really big with one of my pregnancies, I just told him "of course, but I've got an excuse. What's your reason?" That shut him up for a bit. Of course I said it with a really big smile, so we all got a good laugh too.

[billig]

I can see why it would get on your nerves...plus you're pregnant and your hormones are all over the place.

"Yea I am special, 'bout time you all figured it out!"

"I need all that time off for my drugdealing business on the side"

"That was a pretty mean thing to say, don't you know you shouldn't anger a pregnant woman? All my hormones raging I might do something you'd regret initiating"

more direct:

"Why would you say such a rude thing?"

"How old are you?"

[abond0017]

I am sorry you are having trouble with these people. I dont have any other better advice than the pp's...just stand up for yourself like they said...thats pretty much said all I could think of.
I just cant imagine people being so rude to someone who is pregnant...Ill tell you what, when I get pregnant NOONE better treat me like that. Im moody already and after being pregnant...Im sure theyd get more than an earfull pulling some stuff like that. Then theyd just probably call me the crazy lady. ;)