Twilight

[puakinikini]

So I am going to try to make this short - and still not leave out too many details - as I would like to hear other people's opinions on this issue.

Background: My oldest DS is 10 y.o. and lives 50% with us and 50% with his mother (I am his step-mom). He is a well-adjusted kid and while he has very different lifestyles at the two households adapts well to his ever changing life. Just to give you a glimpse, he is a single child at his mom's house and he is the oldest of 4 at our house. At her house he has lots of privacy and down time at ours something is always going on (usually 5 things going on at once). Oh, and yeah, privacy is a premium (although we work hard to keep the little ones out of his bedroom).

In the last two year, DS has gotten into reading - it started with the Magic Tree House series - then Chronicles of Narnia - and then he discovered Harry Potter. He read all 7 Harry Potter books from January to August. He was (and still is) basically obsessed. Since he finished the series he has not really gotten into another book - and we have wanted to encourage this new found love of reading (as it used to be a chore to get him to read anything - and it is a requirement that he read 30 minutes a night for school).

So he mentioned to us that several of his friends had read the Twilight series (author: Stephenie Myer?). His dad took him to Target and they bought it. Well, he was really into it - read the first couple chapters in one sitting. In talking to his mom on the phone, she told him that she did not want him reading that book. He stopped reading it immediately and basically gave it to me to read (I had also expressed interest in it).

He did not know why his mom didn't want him to read it. She has not read the book and as far as I know only knows what he told her about it (he was excited and describing it to her). We figured it was because she is very religious and it had something to do with that, but DH asked her about it last night and she said that she didn't want DS to read it b/c she does not like vampires and thinks it is "yucky". They didn't get far into the conversation - so that is all I know.

It is difficult to co-parent when you have very different households - what is okay at one is often not okay at the other for good reasons. We run up against these issues often, but this particular issue DH and I are still trying to figure out what to do about. We most likely will need to talk to her further - b/c DS says that although he can not read the book, she is going to allow him to see the movie (which I find totally odd). He has been looking forward to the movie that comes out next month. We had told him that we would wait to see what the movie was rated before allowing him to go (but she often allows him to see movies that we would not).

So here are my questions:
1. Should we allow him to read the book while he is at our house? This is the direction that my DH is taking.

2. What exactly is the Christian religious take on vampires? (oh and as a side note the author of the book is Mormon and lives in Phoenix).

3. If you have read the book is it appropriate for a younger audience - I believe it was written for tween and teen girls.


Thanks for all and any advice - and sorry to be so long.

[MrsPinecone]

I would say that he's a little young for it at 10. It's a young adult book, not a children's book. He may be 'into' the first few chapters, but some of the later stuff could be more than he could handle. Vampires can be scary for younger kids, which I consider a ten year old to be.

I didn't find anything objectionable about it for older kids. It's pretty clean-- the author is Mormon, for crying out loud.

I taught middle school English, in case you needed a professional opinion. I would not have recommended it as reading material for a 5th or 6th grader.

[ladywaterwind]

Personally, I would let him read it. If he is so picky about reading, and now he's been able to find books that hold his interest, I would foster that as hopefully as he ages it would blossom into interest for other books and genres.

I think the mother is a little sending mixed messages. How can a movie of the book be ok and not the book itself? That's..odd.

I've not had experience with sets of parents though, so maybe some advice from those with experience in that would better suit you guys. But I do strongly believe that curtailing the so few books he seems into now will hurt him later.

[latte]

my thoughts: if he enjoys reading it~~~then why would you deny him something that he likes? (especially if you read it, and think its ok)


my son will be 9 on saturday and likes the harry potter books........loves csi, how its made, scary movies

my daughter (7) likes those old black and white horror movies (although HG Wells "the time machine" is her all time favorite---she loves the "morlocs")

*my choice of reading materials may not be appropriate for all kids as i was the weird kid that was reading Stephen King @ 9, and R.L. Stine @7 *

[Links2me]

My 11, almost 12 year old is reading the third book now. I have not yet read it, but many of my friends whom I trust have. All have said it would be fine for my DD.

That said, I'd probably let him read it if it were my child. I have no patience for parental games, and that's exactly what I view mom's actions to be. However, if you should choose to go a different route, I would suggest the Pendragon series of books. This would go along the same lines as Harry Potter, something mom apparently doesn't have an issue with. There are 7 in the series, I believe, and are some of my daughter's favorite books. The main character is a boy named Bobby and may appeal to your DS.



Edit: Sorry, there are NINE books in the series, one prequel and another prequel on the way. DD just HAD to correct my unacceptable ignorance regarding the best series of books known to man.

[couponnewbiemich]

My DD is 11 and has all three or four books and since she likes them so much, I thought I would read them myself. The only problem I had is that in the last book it gets pretty graphic about sex.

**** SPOILER ALERT, DO NOT READ BELOW IF YOU ARE IN THE PROCESS OF READING THE BOOK****


After Bella marries Edward they go on vacation and they start having sex it talks about how rough he is and how they broke the bed and whatnot. I know they describe a few sex scene in somewhat graphic detail, so if you have not had "the talk" with your DS, would it be a problem? That, in my opinion is a bigger issue than vampires or werewolves in a book.

[MrsPinecone]

Wow, I am surprised at the number of people who would let a 10 year old read these books. I don't think they are appropriate for the age at all.

I was a voracious reader myself (still am) and made a career out of reading, and my mom put her foot down on whatever books she thought were over my head. She was and still is a school librarian. It just made those books that much more interesting when I was old enough to read them.

[ladywaterwind]

I gave my opinion without having read the books. But if there is sex in it? No way in hell.

[billig]

I think you should read the book right now....then you and your husband will really know what to think about that.

[puakinikini]

Thanks so much for all the advice - I appreciate the different points of view. I am getting to read the book first b/c he is with his mom this week - so I started it last night. I am a very fast reader, but my concern based on what couponnewbie wrote is that they may get more inappropriate as time goes on and I doubt that I would get through the whole series before he gets back to us! Plus, to be honest, it is not holding my attention at all - so doubtful I would continue with the series. I did read all 7 Harry Potter books.

So for now, I think my stance will be that the book gets put up after I read it - and if he asks about it we talk to him about it - but if not we just let the topic go. I also think that we will most likely not take him to the movie - but we will talk to his mom first. I doubt she will take him based on her yucky comment. I am pretty sure we will be having a conversation - as the movie is coming out soon.

He will be 11 next month and is very mature for his age. His parents got divorced at age 6 and they both treated him as more of a friend than a son. Unfortunate, but true. We are trying to stop that pattern now but it is not easy - as he is still treated as an adult in his other home.

We do need to find another series for him - we tried the Pendragon series and he was not interested (but that was before he got into Harry Potter). My sister's son loves that series.

Thanks again for all the advice.