 Re: I need a little help.
I second (actually, third!) Texas. Even though Houston is one of the biggest cities in the US, it doesn't feel like it. everything is very spread out, including the jobs, so you don't have to ever go to downtown if you don't want to. Housing and COL have always been affordable compared to the rest of Texas, which is very affordable compared to most of the country. The job market is also pretty good in Houston, and there are good universities if your DH want's to take advantage of his GI benefits (which I would strongly recommend).
A really good friend of ours lives in a tiny town south of Houston, it's only 25 minutes from downtown but it feels like you are in the country. The north and west sides of town have more upscale suburbs, but there are a few pockets of small-town feel. I stay with my in-laws in Highlands, a suburb on the east side that totally feels like a tiny town, when I have to go to Houston for work - it's about 45 minutes from downtown in rush hour, but a lot closer to the heavy industry along the ship channel (who are always looking for purchasing agents and warehousing people).
Central texas has all that without the giant city, but the COL and housing is more expensive. Jobs are also not quite as easy to come by, because there are a number of very large universities that churn out graduates who would rather take a lower-skilled job (not requiring degree) in order to stay in the area. Because of Ft Hood in Killeen and the AFB in San Antonio, there is a pretty good sized ex-military community.
Best of luck!
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